1.) Uur UPS
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 117.96
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Going all in on the Chicago Bears might have been the move as Caleb Williams put up a historic day on the ground finishing as QB1 with 41.26 fantasy points. Everything else went right for UPS as they look to battle their biggest enemy: injuries.
2.) Matt Attack
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 108.8
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: How will Kenneth Walker fit into a resurgent Chiefs team? About as well as you could possibly imagine in your wildest dreams as Walker finished with 173 yards on the ground and two scores.
3.) Philippines Garbage Dumps
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 105.28
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: The defending champion saw strong contributions from across the board but none more impressive than David Montgomery who finished with three touchdowns in his Texans debut. The Garbage Dumps appear to be loaded with talent with names like Trey’Veon Henderson, Brian Thomas and Jakobi Meyers waiting on the bench.
4.) Isla Sorna Raptors
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 99.32
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: King Henry continues to defy father time with a three touchdown 30+ point game. Henry/Achane and a healthy Lamar Jackson all equal the league’s most potent rushing attack and a nightmare to every fantasy opponent.
5.) Da Moon’s HUGE Craters
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 109.4
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: The Craters finish with the second highest score of Week 1 but unfortunately are in the same division with the highest scoring team which lands them at 5 to open the season. Trevor Lawrence picked up his 2026 season the same as he finished 2025, on an MVP pace.
6.) GoalPost Malone
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 94.6
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Was any player more impressive in Week 1 than D’Andre Swift who led the Bears offensive barrage with three rushing touchdowns to go along with 124 yards on the ground? Accomplishing this in Week 1 with a near 0 from your QB is impressive in your BFFL debut.
7.) Mahomies’ Deezflated Nuts
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 86.06
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Our TE2 on the week is Dallas Goedert who impressed with 77 yards and 2 touchdowns in Week 1. MD Nuts will expect much more from QB Joe Burrow going forward who is prognosticated to have a big season ahead.
8.) Cloud9
Overall Record: 1-0
Divisional Record: 1-0
Total Points Scored: 82.7
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Jahmyr Gibbs smashed any doubt that he should have been the first pick in any fantasy draft in 2026. Chris Olave bounced back after a slow first half to finish with a team high 182 yards on 10 receptions.
9.) NinerMania
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 90.04
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Newcomer NinerMania was left disappointed after a Monday night disaster class from Bo Nix who cost them the game. The good news is Ashton Jeanty and Justin Jefferson shined bright in Week 1.
10.) SLAM BALL 2K26
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 82.96
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Way to waste a 40 point Josh Allen game guys…
11.) Bruce Almightys
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 79.46
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: All things considered Bruce had a good week with contributions from key players such as Javonte Williams and JSN who each found the endzone in their respective games. The only major concern was Scary Terry and how poor the Washington offense looked in Week 1.
12.) Elk Grove Spartans
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 79.36
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: The Spartans skill players did not score a single offensive touchdown and yet they remained competitive with a strong Lamar Jackson game. Look for some strong bounce back performances in Week 2.
13.) Game of Zones
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 77.94
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Crushing blow for Game of Zones who lost Ladd McConkey after a promising start. The good news is the injury appears to be day to day and the entire offense seemed to be built around Ladd.
14.) Jedi Knights
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 75.46
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: The Jedi Knights saw a couple of bad performances from star receivers Puka Nacua and Drake London who are the foundation of this team. Both will need to find the endzone often this season because I do not have a lot of faith in Judkins and the Browns offense as a whole.
15.) Doctor Jenious
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 68.62
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: Drake Maye and AJ Brown sunk the team early on Wednesday night and it was further compounded when it was revealed that Brown would miss 4-6 weeks with a high ankle sprain. The bright spots are that Isaiah Likely appears to be the real deal and Bhayshul Tuten did fantastic work with limited touches.
16.) Moore on the Run
Overall Record: 0-1
Divisional Record: 0-1
Total Points Scored: 52.76
Position Last Week: N/A
Notes: This is a Week 1 to forget for Neighbor Nic as you can write off a zero from Colston Loveland, 1.2 points for Ja’Marr Chase and a myriad of bad performances across the board. My guess is huge positive regression in Week 2.
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