It was a scoring bonanza in South Beach as the Miami Dolphins almost set the all time scoring record and put up the most points in an NFL game since 1966.
1.) Mahomies’ Deezflated Nuts
Overall Record: 3-0
Divisional Record: 3-0
Total Points Scored: 313.7
Position Last Week: 2
Notes: Three weeks in and we have a new #1 seed and contender to be the juggernaut of the season. The duo of Mike Evans and Keenan Allen continues to provide elite WR1 production on a weekly basis.
2.) Pool of the Dead
Overall Record: 3-0
Divisional Record: 3-0
Total Points Scored: 303.3
Position Last Week: 1
Notes: Tyreek Hill continues to be a terror for opposing defenses as the Pool of the Dead rolls to another dominant start. Getting strong games out of Kenneth Walker and Deshaun Watson to complement a strong receiver group is only going to bolster this team’s Superbowl aspirations.
3.) Da Moon’s Huge Craters
Overall Record: 3-0
Divisional Record: 3-0
Total Points Scored: 218.3
Position Last Week: 6
Notes: We have a new team leading the South and they are blasting off to the moon. While all eyes were on Travis Kelce this past weekend, it was Captain Kirk Cousins who put together another strong game to jump up to QB5 on the season.
4.) Lin Sanity
Overall Record: 2-1
Divisional Record: 2-1
Total Points Scored: 234.5
Position Last Week: 3
Notes: It’s always tough to lose these close Monday night games, but not all hope is lost for Lin Sanity. Their immediate Chubb replacement, Jerome Ford, immediately elevated to a stronger role and got all the valuable touches including two touchdowns.
5.) Korriban Warriors
Overall Record: 2-1
Divisional Record: 2-1
Total Points Scored: 269.3
Position Last Week: 5
Notes: Justin Herbert’s fantasy MVP campaign officially starts today as the rising star QB is now ranked QB1 on the season after a down year in 2022. It’s no surprise that the addition of Kellen Moore and a fast paced offense has put this electric offense into overdrive.
6.) Philippines Garbage Dumps
Overall Record: 2-1
Divisional Record: 2-1
Total Points Scored: 265.5
Position Last Week: 9
Notes: Last week I said I was not worried about the PGD and this week I was proven right as they steamrolled their opponent to a dominant Week 3 win. They are firing on all cylinders as Raheem Mostert’s career day was supplemented by a strong Lamar game and Justin Jefferson continues to be the best receiver in the game.
7.) No Diggity…about to bag it up
Overall Record: 2-1
Divisional Record: 2-1
Total Points Scored: 223.5
Position Last Week: 7
Notes: Stefon Diggs and late addition Isiah Pacheco proved to be solid again to put this team into playoff and division race contention. The big question moving forward is the health and overall ceiling for Joe Burrow.
8.) Uur UPS
Overall Record: 2-1
Divisional Record: 2-1
Total Points Scored: 194.6
Position Last Week: 4
Notes: It was a tough week for UPS who have been hit hard with injuries the first three weeks and were without Saquon Barkley. But they may have found a draft gem in rookie Dolphins RB De’Von Achane who may be elevated to a starting role soon.
9.) Gandalf the Goat
Overall Record: 1-2
Divisional Record: 1-2
Total Points Scored: 236.3
Position Last Week: 8
Notes: It was a strong game from Patrick Mahomes but not much else after that which could keep up to a 120+ point performance from their opponent. The Goat will rely on the return of Breece Hall and Brandon Aiyuk to the starting lineup in Week 4 to get back on track.
10.) Jedi Knights
Overall Record: 1-2
Divisional Record: 1-2
Total Points Scored: 225.7
Position Last Week: 15
Notes: It was a much needed win for the Jedi Knights who got their season on track and its all systems go for Tua and this high powered offense. Not to be lost in the shuffle is Zack Moss who got the lion’s share of the work and a monster 30 carry game leading to a dominant fantasy day.
11.) Bruce Almightys
Overall Record: 1-2
Divisional Record: 1-2
Total Points Scored: 216.1
Position Last Week: 14
Notes: That was a vintage Davante Adams performance if I’ve ever seen one and it looked like he was unstoppable. Bruce got a huge victory to avoid an 0-3 start and will continue to be in the mix as long as Josh Allen and Davante carry the squad.
12.) Elk Grove Spartans
Overall Record: 1-2
Divisional Record: 1-2
Total Points Scored: 208.6
Position Last Week: 11
Notes: It was a true Monday night miracle for the Elk Grove Spartans as they turned to the Rams receivers for a comeback victory. With everyone focused on the rise of Puka Nacua, watch out for Tutu Atwell who is quietly sitting at WR12 on the season.
13.) Sacramento Wolf Pack
Overall Record: 1-2
Divisional Record: 1-2
Total Points Scored: 208.3
Position Last Week: 10
Notes: There was not much the Wolf Pack could do to contend this week against a strong performance from their opponent. Losing Mike Williams for the season will be a huge blow as the team will turn to their strong depth of Amari Cooper and Jakobi Meyers.
14.) Isla Sorna Raptors
Overall Record: 0-3
Divisional Record: 0-3
Total Points Scored: 197.3
Position Last Week: 13
Notes: It was another tough day at the office for Justin Fields as the Bears season seems to be unraveling and even the dynamic third year QB can’t seem to extract any fantasy value out of this season.
15.) Doctor Jenious
Overall Record: 0-3
Divisional Record: 0-3
Total Points Scored: 174.3
Position Last Week: 16
Notes: The doctor found that much needed Hurts-Brown connection in Week 3 but unfortunately did not find much else.
16.) SLAM BALL 2K23
Overall Record: 0-3
Divisional Record: 0-3
Total Points Scored: 172.3
Position Last Week: 12
Notes: Ladies and gentlemen, your reigning, defending, undisputed, defeated Toilet Bowl contender of the year.
